Gun Jam

The gun must have jammed for a reason. ~ Special Agent Paul Kellerman

One of the best things I've learned from Prison Break is that when everything fails or go against your plans, God has better plans for you. During their escape attempts, Michael Scofield and the rest did not succeed right away. They have to go through several attempts and process or worse even have to set back from the very beginning again. You see, in this life sometimes we get to experience things that are so completely contrary to what we plan and hope for. However if we take a look at things closely, we will realize as to how great things has eventually turned out because God has better plans for us.

Once in my career as a telemarketer at Callbox, Inc,I felt so embarrassed and deprived because I needed to undergo another training for a month under the program called Skills Enhancement Program (SEP). It sounds pretty good but the idea of being under the said program means shame for an agent who's been working with the company for several months and actually gone through the probationary period. When I heard I would be under it I cried so hard because I can't accept the fact that I am no good or that I am at the bottom when it comes to performance when the truth is there are still some agents who much deserve the spot than I do. I had to quit my part-time job as a Korean tutor because the department where we will have to report for duty has a schedule in conflict with the tutorial. I felt so down and felt a little bitter over my leaders because after they got so much from me (months prior to that I was the top agent of the said Department), they would just dismiss me like I didn't perform well before the said event.

Our SEP training prove to be very helpful because there I gained friends that like me, we all tried to overcome that depressing phase in our lives and get on our feet again. Our trainer, Ms. Janice Jorque was very considerate and professional. She inspired me a lot and gave us the very hope we all needed. She endorsed me to the Information Technology Products and Services (ITPS) Department. Gladys Vencer, then Production Leader (PL) of the department I am now in, interviewed me and seem to like me due to my attendance record. Days later I find myself starting over again in a different environment and setting. Jay-R Baustista and Nick Salinog( the latter became my Team Leader) who were Sales Coaches then taught us the product knowledge about the accounts to be handled for ITPS. The accounts of ITPS are much more complicated when compared to those of the former departments I've been to such as those of Merchants, Financials, Commercials, B2C(Business to Consumer), the latter for the training period of SEP. The adjustment period wasn't easy because I have to set appointments and generate leads by talking to C-Level people like that of CIO's , CTO's, IT Manager, VP's, SVP's of Fortune 1000 companies in the United States. I remembered for almost three months I don't have a production for my VoIP appointment setting account but the department didn't give up on me.

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For months I struggled (I still do) on reaching my production quota. I've been through a lot of tests and passed them with God's Divine help. There was a time when the company has to lay off some agents due to the recession. Praise God that even I wasn't performing very well they kept me. During those times I needed to keep my fingers crossed not to be picked again until today...

Around 4:00 in the morning, my Team Leader Nick Salinog asked me to join them (Nong Emil our PL, Jay-R our Sales Coach and Lynn Frances Deguma our Quality Assurance Specialist) in conference room 2B. I had an idea what the meeting would be about. Prior to that Andre Causing told us he is about to be transferred to BPS department. We asked him who he thinks would be transferred with him and he mentioned a name. I felt a little relieved until I was called.

We talked about how I continuously struggle reaching my production quota and failing in my QA ratings. They said I have a perfect attendance record but it's just that Callbox is a performance-based company. Unlike my previous encounter with Nong Emil, I was surprised with my courage and I didn't cry amidst it (or at least when they told me the news that I too is being considered for transfer). I told them I understand their situation that they're just being forced to do it because our department's revenue is getting lower and lower and getting to the nerves of our CEO, Rom Agustin. I told them I understand that at some point or another, we all have to go through about letting go. I just asked them not to transfer me to a department that would require me working on Sunday because I need to attend the services in the Church during that day. They all agreed I will be considered an interview with the PL of BPS.

Then came the tears. I told Nong Emil to transfer me to any other departments except BPS. I don't like relaying to them what happend several months ago but they said they needed a reason why they would heed to my request. Months ago I was using the phone wherein we could make free calls in the United States to our relatives and friends. I didn't know that Sheryl Colindres, the PL of BPS was waiting for her turn to use the phone. Me and my friend, Jihan Isberto were chit chatting for more then 15 minutes already. Thinking there was no one affected by it, we kept on talking over the phone. Sheng then motioned to me that I'm not supposed to exceed 15 minutes. She then told Ms. Kai, our HR Manager about my violation. The latter just dismissed it. Sheng asked my name and from there I know she would remember me for such encounter. With that thought I am afraid ot be transferred to the department wherein she is the Production Leader. They all agreed that she won't hold that against me. Well I don't know, we never know. I don't know her that much.

So they agreed that either I would try in BPS or APAC (Asia Pacific Accounts). I composed myself and went to my cube and started calling again. In between calls I would sob and knowI would miss ITPS and the friends I've made for such a long period of time in this Department. It's the only department where I attended the team building activities and really enjoyed it. It's the only department wherein I felt loved and cared about. It's the only department I felt happy. Now all these things I will have to leave behind and face a new beginning.

Andre was preparing to be interviewed, to our surprise, by Karen JJ of Commercials and not BPS. The thought just came in a flash, oh there it is, there's still Commercials. I've been hearing not so good feedbacks about the said department and the reality strucked me, I could be considered in the said department.

Then Sir Nick told me not to go upstairs for the interview. I still have a contract with the account that I am currently handling--Titan, I'm calling under the name Nancy Diaz with the contract ending on August 10. Nong Emil told me that they will be giving me another chance until the said date to reach my quota. As of this date, I only have one success call. It may feel a little hopeless but I'm not. Then I remembered Paul Kellerman when he was trying to pull the trigger of his gun, it jammed. I thanked God at that moment. I knew He was trying to tell me something. I knew it was a big wake up call for me that I needed to appreciate and take care of what I now have.

Sometimes things may be completely the opposite of what we plan or hope for. But be still and know that He is God and all knowing. I know He has a perfect time table. I am ready for whatever He would like to do with my life as "Thy will be done". His thoughts are higher than mine and who am I to complain. I know He has better plans for me. If it was His plan for me to remain with ITPS, then there must be some good reason why the "gun jammed".

In our lives there will be a lot of gun jams. It takes a lot of faith and courage to trust in the Lord and His plans. It takes patience to wait for our dreams to come true. It takes a lot of hardwork in order to succeed. At the end of the day, I know that God has better plans for me because "sometimes there are some things that are beyond your control" (Alex Mahone).


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